I dreamed of Kaitlyn last night

When I went to bed last night, I had a great deal of anxiety. I could hardly go to sleep and the times I did I don’t think I was completely asleep. Early this morning, I had a dream about Kaitlyn. We were walking together. She looked like she did the last time I saw her with her short hair. She was smiling the sweet smile she always had, and had the sweet demeanor she always had and she seemed happy. She had both of her hands on my upper arm as we walked together. While we were walking there were visions above us. The only way I can describe these visions are that they were of the way people were once treated years ago when they had mental illness. One person was confined to a small, enclosed space and not allowed to get out. There were other scenes but those are too foggy to remember.

It was probably just the result of my fitful sleep and distraught state that caused this strange dream. But if I wanted to think it real and would interpret it, I would interpret it as Kaitlyn telling me she didn’t tell anyone of her depression due to the stigma attached to it and the problems it may cause by admitting to it and getting help. Even though it’s not as bad as it once was, there is still a stigma attached to it. That’s the way I’m taking the dream anyway. But it was good to see her smile if only in my dreams.

About gatito2

My name is Rhonda. I'm a registered nurse, for the last 20 years, that has not been able to work since the day I learned of my daughter's death by suicide 4-12-13. (She actually died 4-11-13 and her body was not found until the 12th) Me and my husband have been married for 32 years and he's a wonderful man. We grieve in different ways. He works, I write. This is my journey through this horrible land of losing a child..
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4 Responses to I dreamed of Kaitlyn last night

  1. My 14 year old committed suicide 12/6/12
    I cannot work yet, and still wonder if she did it because of MY mental illness or hers……………….


  2. Susan Anderson says:

    My thoughts are with you. I have only dreamt of our son, Eric, 3 times since his death in Nov of 2007. I wish you peace for the daysz and months ahead.

    Susan, Eric’s mom


  3. gatito2 says:

    I am SO sorry!! I don’t know when I’ll be able to work. If you need to vent just let me know.


  4. gatito2 says:

    Thank you Susan. I was wanting a more peaceful, clearer dream of Kaitlyn. I was very anxious when I went to bed. But I’ll take this one.


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