I Am Going To Put Up a Real Christmas Tree!

I want to share something that I put on my FB this morning. I was going to hide out for Christmas, not put a tree up and just hope it passes without notice but I have changed my mind. Please note, I’m just copying what I put on my FB page and in no way expect any of you to send in an ornament. I was just wanting to know if family or her friends wanted to do this. You have people you are grieving for of your own and I would never expect that. But this is what I’m going to do and why:

“First of all, I don’t expect people to do this, but wanted to give Kaitlyn’s friends or just anyone that wants to a chance to do this if they want. I have decided that instead of ignoring Christmas totally this year, I’m going to buy a REAL Christmas tree. I want to do this because Christmas was Kaitlyn’s favorite time of the year and she LOVED a real tree. Every time I see these trees being sold all around they call to me.

So thanks to some advice from some of you, I decided that it would be fun to buy a real tree and put different ornaments than what I have been putting up for years. I will still put the ones with Stephanie and Kaitlyn’s names on them, and some they made, and some with their birthdays on them, but that is all. The rest of them are going to be totally new.

I thought I would buy some of the little frame ornaments and put pics of Kaitlyn, Stephanie, me and Allyn in them from different years (I found a pack of 12). I’ve gone to amazon.com and found a lot I like. I’m also going to buy ornaments that have something to do with Kaitlyn’s life, maybe cats, maybe squirrels, maybe angels (that she wrote about once), and just anything like that. I may even buy cat toys to hang up there because I know the cats will get into the tree. I may not put lights up so the cats won’t chew on them, but will put many ornaments and I think that will be special enough. I want to honor Kaitlyn with this tree with things she loved and pics of all her family. I think she would like that, I really do. I feel really driven to do this for some reason. I think she wants me to.

Allyn does not want a tree due to the cats. We talked about it last night. We will buy a tree this weekend because it means so much to me.

If any of Kaitlyn’s friends or other family would like to pick out one special ornament to send to me and put on the tree in her honor from them, I would love for you to do that. It could be something you think she would like, or just something pretty and does not have to be expensive. Again, I don’t really expect anyone to do this, but I would love it if you do. If not, that is ok too. I can buy enough to fill the tree. If someone does want to send an ornament, message me and I will give you my address. I don’t expect anyone to send anything like I said and if no ornaments come, I understand and it’s ok. I know you loved her anyway. Just wanted to include you if you wanted to participate. I’m excited!”

Below is Kaitlyn’s last Christmas this past year, standing in front of her first tree since she went away to college, her boyfriend, and her cat Gatito. She named her tree Charlie. She loved to name things.

tree

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About gatito2

My name is Rhonda. I'm a registered nurse, for the last 20 years, that has not been able to work since the day I learned of my daughter's death by suicide 4-12-13. (She actually died 4-11-13 and her body was not found until the 12th) Me and my husband have been married for 32 years and he's a wonderful man. We grieve in different ways. He works, I write. This is my journey through this horrible land of losing a child..
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4 Responses to I Am Going To Put Up a Real Christmas Tree!

  1. jmgoyder says:

    What a wonderful idea – could you email me your address?

    Like

  2. gatito2 says:

    Thank you so much!! I just emailed it to you. Let me know if you don’t get it. That is so kind of you.

    Like

  3. lensgirl53 says:

    A loving gesture to make your Christmas special. Our first Christmas without Brandon I decorated the tree completely in blue lights…because it was a very blue Christmas. I have since moved on to multi- colored because of my husband’s insistence. I also do what you are doing by putting Brandon’s picture ornament at the top of the tree along with all the ornaments he made as a child. As much as I did not feel like having Christmas, I had to do it because our granddaughter lives with us…she is now 12. She and our middle daughter (her mom) have lived with us since she was 4 yrs. old.. I have had to do a lot of things I did not feel like doing for her sake.

    I am so glad you are going ahead with your real tree. I would love to send an ornament if you will send me your address. Everyone that I know who has lost a child has done something special to honor their memory. It’s the next best thing….xo dale

    Like

  4. gatito2 says:

    Thank you so much! That is so kind of you!! Your tree sounds beautiful as well. I don’t have
    grandchildren so I don’t really have to do anything for a child’s sake. Actually, I had lost the Christmas spirit for a few years now (I think it was due to my depression) and we have not had a tree for a few years. Last year I wanted to put our artificial one up, but my husband feared our cat would tear it down. (we have no always had a house cat up until 3 years ago) I had NO intentions of celebrating Christmas in any form much less a tree this year, but for some reason I feel driven to do it. Probably because Kaitlyn loved them. She only wanted us to put up real trees in the last several years of her life. But after she went away to med school, she was never home long for Christmas so it really didn’t matter what we put up. This year, she wants me to do it. I feel good about it too. Strange isn’t it?

    I will send you my address. Again, it is so kind of you to do that and I thank you very much. Rhonda

    Like

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