The Last Fabric Sheet

I used the last fabric sheet just now that I took out of Kaitlyn’s apartment and put in the dryer that was once hers. It never ends. At least an amputated limb heals over if treated properly even though phantom pain may persist forever. But the amputation of most of your heart and soul that comes with the loss of your child never heals, never even scabs over, never scars, but is left fresh and bleeding.

I do not grieve privately it seems.


About gatito2

My name is Rhonda. I'm a registered nurse, for the last 20 years, that has not been able to work since the day I learned of my daughter's death by suicide 4-12-13. (She actually died 4-11-13 and her body was not found until the 12th) Me and my husband have been married for 32 years and he's a wonderful man. We grieve in different ways. He works, I write. This is my journey through this horrible land of losing a child..
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6 Responses to The Last Fabric Sheet

  1. Anonymous. says:

    I think sometimes doing things ” privately” can actually be more harmful- it seems Kaitlyn tried to handle her most profound obstacle privately, preventing others from trying to help her. Through your grief and your grieving process, you’ve managed to connect with people – some with similar losses, some who may be in the same position as your beautiful daughter was. There is a great value to that.

    I can understand the meaning that might be felt in the objects Kaitlyn left behind- they speak to a life that was interrupted, and to a person who put her best effort in living fully and living well.


  2. gatito2 says:

    Thank you for those beautiful words.


  3. Thank you for following our blog. You are strong for sharing your pain. Hang in there…


  4. You are right, it never seems to end. Even when I think I am through all the ‘firsts’, another one hits me out of the blue. I’m getting better at navigating them! Hang in there.


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