I guess this past mother’s day was harder than what I had expected. Spending an entire day in front of others and trying not to cry is more than my body and mind can take and I’ve been physically and mentally pretty sick for the past several days, questioning if the things I do are right or should be done and said at all. I thought I was learning and trying to get through everything this year in a positive way. I still feel stuck in the same place I was on that day I learned of…….my Kaitlyn’s death.
Last night as I was sitting on my couch reflecting on many things and it was still just light enough to see everything but getting dark, I noticed my cat Dagny at the sliding glass door. I had the blinds still open because he likes to see all the critters out there. I looked and I kept seeing things flying back and forth past the doors. I had a feeling I knew what they were. Dagny’s tail was swishing hard back and forth like he does when he see’s something that excites him (and he really wishes he was out there so he could catch, play and/or eat them). I went to the door, sat down beside him and back and forth they flew past my doors. Every 30 seconds or so, one would hit the glass gently and stay for a split second then fly away. They were dragonflies. The first I’ve seen this year. Hi Kaitlyn.
After several minutes I went back to the couch and I never saw another one. A little later on when it was totally dark, I heard Kaitlyn’s cat Gatito jumping onto my glass door in the front living room. I had opened the wooden door earlier so he could see out when it got later in the day and it was still open and it was then dark. I was going to close the door since it was completely dark then. He had been jumping up on the glass because bugs had been landing on it. I went to shut the door, but hated to because he was having such a good time, but I stopped short because the moon had just risen over the trees and it was full and beautiful. There were some long clouds that were just below it that were lit up from its light. It was absolutely beautiful. So I sat down with Gatito as he was busy looking out into the sky as well…..and he purred. Then I looked over to the far right where Kaitlyn’s memorial garden is and I saw the dragonfly on a stick that my sister Gail gave me, and sure to its intended purpose, it was lit up changing colors from blue, to red, to green and over again.
Hello Kaitlyn. I miss you.